When i was 12 you would order sandwichs for me cause subway was to loud.

Id save you a seat next to me in the basement and you always made me feel a part of things.

Like it was ok to be there and I was wanted. 

After you always walked me to the train or my dad.

You made sure I was safe and always included.

I hold that inside of me as memory of haveing a faimly and being loved.

You are my mental safe place,

so why now do you make feel like I need to slink away quietly and hide?

Why do I feel like spill that needs to be hidden from the adults?

You’ve always been there to clean me up and set things right,

so why do I feel like I live under the rug with the rest of the dust and crumbs of the past.

I know we change as we grow,

But have we changed that much?

You loved me once,

I called you brother.

Where is my brother now?